5 Ways to Increase Your Certainty in the Middle of Chaos

When a man lives in uncertainty, he creates chaos in his life. Every time he feels uncertain, his wife feels it, his kids feel it, and the world around him begins to crumble. 

Uncertainty creates procrastination. Uncertainty creates a lack of connection. Uncertainty creates a victim mentality. Most men lose the EDGE because they are living in uncertainty. They live dwelling in the guilt and shame and the what-ifs, and are stuck in a place of indecision. They can’t make a decision to save their lives. 

In a world full of uncertainty the job of a man is to create certainty in his world. Your job as a leader is to create certainty. If you don’t create certainty, it’s going to drain your energy. The feminine energy is attracted by certainty. People are looking for somebody they could follow; they want to follow a leader who has certainty. People want to know that you know exactly where you’re going. People want to know you stand for something. 

The man with the most certainty has the most influence. That's why we are constantly talking about how to bring certainty in the middle of chaos. Can you stand in front of the storm and still have certainty that you’re going to figure things out? 

Certainty doesn’t mean you have everything figured out. It means that you have a knowingness that you will. Certainty is the feeling that you know, no matter what happens, you will find a way. 

The job of the leader is to create certainty. If you have uncertainty in your business, your marriage, etc., it’s on you. That’s your job as a man: To create more certainty. How can you develop certainty in the middle of chaos? 

1- Perspective 

Perspective allows you to have the power of reframing what’s happening in your life. Shit can always be worse. Whatever you’re going through now, someone out there hopes to have your kind of problems. Someone out there has overcome what you’re going through right now. This allows you to have a reframe, so instead of arguing with reality, you embrace reality. You accept reality. From this place, you find certainty knowing shit could be worse. Somebody has already been through what you’re going through, and somebody out there wishes he had your problems. The moment you have perspective, you will find certainty.

2- Nothing lasts forever.

A man who has uncertainty thinks that the way things are is the way things will always be. He’s always going to be broke/alone/sick. Good times don’t last forever, bad times don’t last forever. Everything is going to pass. You can grow with each season. Every season in life is an opportunity to grow. You choose to become a victim or a victor. 

Who you become during those times is what matters. It’s not the good times or the bad times, it’s who you become through the journey. You can have certainty knowing that no matter what you’re going through, there’s always a next season.

3- Focus on what you can control. 

Most of us lose our certainty because we are constantly trying to control things that we can’t control. You can’t control other people, the market, the weather, politics, etc. If you focus on the things you can control, you’re going to have more certainty knowing that you have the power to execute. You can’t control your thoughts, but you can control what you focus on. You are in control of your actions and reactions. You can’t control how people act, but you can control how you react to them. You can only control yourself.

You can’t change your past, but you can control what you do in the present. What are you doing today that will get you closer to what you want in life? What are you doing today to grow and expand? What are you doing to solve your problems? 

Being present creates certainty. Most men last certainty because they aren’t present. They’re constantly living in the past or worrying about the future. They can’t focus on the present moment and do something about it.

3- Managing your state

If you can’t manage your state, you’re going to be up and down. Things are going to trigger you. You’re going to be upset and mad. If you don’t control your state, everyone else will control it. 

There are 4 types of states:

Fucked

Shitty

Good 

Great

If you’re fucked, you’re looking for someone to blame. You want someone else to be the reason you feel this way. If you’re feeling shitty, you’re looking for someone to save you. You are looking for hope. If you feel good, you hope things will last. If you feel great, you rely on discipline to maintain your state. 

Don’t rely on your emotions. Have a system and process based on discipline. A great state is achieved by design by conditioning yourself daily. Chip away at the version of yourself that doesn’t serve you. Have awareness of your thoughts, of your reactions. Look at the patterns every day, and stop reacting to life. If you can’t manage your state, you’re going to be a victim of your circumstances. 

4- Do hard shit!

This is how you find certainty. Nothing worthwhile is going to be easy. If you expect things to be twice as hard as you think, you’ll never be disappointed. Most people are looking for things to be easy. They want things to be a certain way, but if you expect things to be twice as hard, it’s not going to surprise you. 

Don’t pray for an easy life, pray for strength to do the things others can’t. That’s the moment you find certainty, when you commit to doing the hard shit that most men won’t do. 

5- Choose to be a co-creator.

Choose to be a co-creator of your life. Don’t wait for God to save you, you have to be a participant in your own salvation. You have to be active. It’s not about praying and meditating and hoping and wishing, it’s about you focusing on what you can do every day. Play your part. God has given you the tools, it’s up to you to participate in your salvation by doing the fucking work. Show up every day. There is no upside to being a victim of your circumstances. All the upside is knowing that you are a co-creator of your destiny. 

Certainty is the new currency. Your family, your team, and your clients all need to find your certainty. People want to follow a man who knows where he’s going. You don’t need to know how to get there, but you are going to figure shit out because you are being guided. People around you need to feel that certainty because you have been called to lead. It will not be easy, but the moment you feel that calling, just know that God has already paved the way. The higher version of yourself has already been there. Stop arguing with reality. Stop doubting yourself. Stop running away from the storms. Embrace the storm, because the storm is shaping and molding you. But if you’re looking for things to be easy, you’re going to live a life of uncertainty. 

Every day, it’s your job to build certainty. It starts with you. Certainty in your faith, in your body, in your relationships, and your business. Stop being a victim of your circumstances, because your kingdom rises and falls with you. If you don’t have the balls to take ownership, you are going to live in a world full of uncertainty. This is what leadership is: can you build certainty in a world full of uncertainty. Can you surrender to God knowing that even if you don’t know how to find the answers, you’ve been called to do something great. That fire inside of you fuels you. The desire to do more is what gives you certainty.  

Build your certainty by 1% every day. Every day, I wake up with uncertainty, but I don’t stay there. I acknowledge those feelings, but I choose to be a co-creator with God, because the only other option is to become a victim of circumstances. 



For more insights and to connect with Raul Villacis, check out his Youtube channel and other social media platforms.

"Learn it, live it, love life." - Raul Villacis

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